This site is dedicated to my fondness for fowl. Not in any way that requires years of therapy. It's not even my favorite meat. I just think it's neat. What can I say? I am easily amused.
Plus, it may have something to do with the fact that my first and middle names said together are a homonym of poultry (Paul Troy).

Friday, February 29, 2008

Another Day at the Office




Okay, so maybe not all that typical of a day...but at least I was having a better time than the day before.

The Keeping My Cool Friday Shuffle

Yesterday I got pretty upset at work. It's not one of my proudest moments and while I don't think my job will be in jeopardy because of it, it's something I don't want to repeat anytime soon. Lord, get me off of this project! So, here to mellow me out, let me introduce Fred: Um, Fred? You're on...

1. "Take a Chance on Me", by ABBA

2. "Oh! Darling", by the Beattles

3. "Coastal Confessions", by Mr. Mellow himself, Jimmy Buffett

4. "Cat's in the Cradle", by Harry Chapin My pre-fatherhood thoughts on this song were incredulous - how could a dad do that?! My current thoughts are panic ridden - oh crap, am I doing that?!

5. "For Lovin' Me", by Peter, Paul, & Mary. I never really listened to the lyrics before...not nice, you guys.

6. "On a Day Like Today", by Bryan Adams

7. "I've Got To Use My Imagination", by Gladys & the Pips.

8. "Same in Any Language", by Ruckus

9. "Help Me Mary", by Liz Phair - hmmmm, okay, Fred, this song is not helping.

10. "How Can You Live in the NorthEast", by Paul Simon


Happy Leap Year Everyone & Have a Great Weekend!

Thursday, February 28, 2008

Say What?

This morning, we were all getting ready for the day and Mrs. Pheasantly was playing with son # 1 in the kitchen. She was speaking really silly and getting our son to laugh when he turned to her and said, "Mommy, talk nor-bul-ly, please".

So, do any of you happen to speak Norbul? Would you know if it is a romance language?

Couldn't Resist

While I'd love to take credit, this is from an email sent by a friend:

A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Musically Challenged

I can’t sing,
I can’t dance,
The only thing about me is the way I walk blog

Yes, it's true. I can’t sing and yet I seem to insist on it, particularly when alcohol is involved, and Sunday night was no exception when we had friends over to sing Karaoke on Wii. While I should know better, I do it anyways – kind of like the house cat who comes tearing ‘round the corner at breakneck speed only to careen into the closed sliding glass door, something the cat has done countless times before.

I like to sing at the office. It’s a quiet office and sometimes, when it’s too quiet, I feel the need to sing…loudly. Back to the cat analogy: it’s as if the not-so-bright house cat is taking a dozen other unwilling cats with him for the trip into the glass door. Oh, what fun is had by all.

As I’ve said, I sing poorly when I don’t have alcohol as an aide, but once I’ve downed 3 margaritas (as was the case Sunday night) well, now we’re talking. Okay, I still sing poorly, but now I do so with a slur.

And while I bastardized the musical selections Sunday night, there were two exceptions: “Time After Time”, by Cindy Lauper and “We’re Not Gonna Take It”, by Twisted Sister. Wow. I’m not sure if I am pleased of myself or if I am horrified.

What do y’all think?

Monday, February 25, 2008

Apparently...

$4550.00The Cadaver Calculator - Find out how much your body is worth.


Basically my shell of a body is equivelant to a used Honda Civic. And depending upon the day that you ask her, my wife may opt for the latter.

SOOOOO, how much is YOUR body worth? Be sure to let me know in my comments.

Thanks Eric for turning me onto Just Say Hi

Sunday, February 24, 2008

Holy Mother of All Things Sacred

I AM TIRED!

Child # 2, who is 4 months old, and who "graduated" to sleeping in his own room 9 days ago, still hasn't quite gotten the hang of a sleeping routine, a.k.a NO ONE ELSE IN THE FAMILY GETS TO SLEEP EITHER!

It first seemed that he went to sleep at 8, awoke at 11, and then again at 5. Then he got into a routine of sleeping from 8 to 1, then up for a feeding, and back down until 6. Now the little bugger has apparently combined both into one! Last night he was up around at 11:30, at which point we tried to let him "cry it out" as we were sticking to his schedule. Well, at 12:45 his big brother called from his room very annoyed that he couldn't sleep because the baby was crying. Well, yeah. So wifey fed him and put him back down. He awoke again at 4 and we let him "cry it out" which took about 45 minutes, all the while hoping that he wouldn't wake his big brother. He woke up again around 6:30, at which point wifey brought him into bed for their "wake up together slowly time", aka she gets to cat nap for an hour or so. Did I mention that 6:30 is when son # 1's internal alarm clock goes off like clock work telling him it's breakfast time?!

So, how did you sleep last night?

Saturday, February 23, 2008

Oh My

I have been trying to increase my circle of blogger friends. One technique is that I click on stuff that I put in my profile to see who else shares that interest. Then I go over and if I like what I see, I say "hi". Riveting, huh? So, I worked through the list of interests, and then started adding some I hadn't thought of. Harmless enough, right? I was in a warm-and-fuzzy mood the other day, so I added thinks like kindness, sharing, etc. When I clicked on sharing, it brought up a profile and I then clicked on their blog - oh-my-Gawd! Folks, I don't blush easily...but I must've looked like a summer tomato. I found a blog where someone has an interest in "sharing", in the the...shall we say...Biblical sense. And the blog was complete with pictures. Now for those of you that are still reading this post and haven't gone off to recreate my discovery, let me tell you, the real joyous part of this endeavour was...I was doing it at work. Luckily no one else was in the room when my 17 inch monitor showed helpful photos of this person's hobby. Yikes.

Friday, February 22, 2008

You in Six Words

I got this from Hilda, who got it from a friend...based on Not Quite What I Was Planning: Six-Word Memoirs by Writers Famous and Obscure.

So can you tell your story in six words? If you want to play, let me know in my comments.

Here's mine: Looking for growth every single day.

The Should We Stay or Should We Go Friday Shuffle

This is a question that we'll be asking at work today in reference to whether or not our project team has to work the weekend (again) in order to support a recent deployment. So, hoping for the best, take 'er away Fred.

1. "Sweet Potato Pie", by Ray Charles with James Taylor. Way to hit it out of the park with your first pick, Fred!
2. "My Father's Gun", by Elton John off of the soundtrack for Elizabethtown. Great song. Good movie. Awesome soundtrack.
3. "Hark, the Herald Angels Sing", by Mantovani. Woops.
4. "Trynna Find a New Way", by Nelly Furtado
5. "Ticket to Ride", by the Beatles. Anybody know what they're singin' about?
6. "Dead Man's Hill", by the Indigo Girls
7. "Thank You", by Led Zepellin. A very sweet & poetic love song.
8. "He Went to Paris", by Jimmy Buffett. Fred knows 98 Buffett tunes and went with this one. Is this a sign?
9. "Money Changes Everything", by Cyndi Lauper
10. "Sense of Purpose", by The Pretenders (Okay these guys, the Indigo Girlos, & 10,000 Maniacs - they all seem interchangeable to me...is that wrong?)

Hmmm, and the Clash did not grace our shuffle. Oh well.

In closing, let me share with you an interchange I just had with son # 1. He was changing out of his night time diaper into underwear and he said to me, "When you don't have clothes, you're naked. And when you do, you're not." Thank you, Captain Obvious! Still cute though, huh?

Thursday, February 21, 2008

Our Own Mortality

I went to a funeral yesterday. It was to celebrate the life and acknowledge the passing of a lady I never met. She was the mom of a coworker, fellow blogger, and very good friend. The funeral was in Spanish, and by Spanish, I mean the real deal. Attendees that speak Spanish, a group that sadly I do not represent, commented afterwards that they too weren't sure what the priest had said because of his strong Galician accent.

I had gone with a few other coworkers straight from the office, we stayed only for the service, and then we headed back to the office. Anyone wanna guess what we talked about on the car ride both ways? Pssst. Hint: Look at the title for this post. We talked about how each of us wanted to be interred/disposed of. We also spoke of folks who work overtime (eh-hem) and save for retirement like crazy (eh-hem), with the general consensus being that it really sucks for people like that who meet an early demise. So, there is something for me to think about.

There is another positive side effect of attending a funeral like the one that we went to. I checked in with one of my coworkers today, and wouldn't you know that both of us called our moms last night?

I am sorry for my friend's loss. I am grateful for the needed awareness that the loss brought to others, me included.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Reunited, and it feels so good!

Today marks the one week-iversary of the day when I lost (and then found) something that I cherish very much: Fred. So, how shallow and materialistic does that make me? Actually, I don't think that it does. Because for the thirty minutes that I had thought Fred was gone forever, what I was most upset about was that I was pretty certain our separation was due to my own pure stupidity.

Here's how it played out:

Fred is pretty much a home body, except for when Mrs. Pheasantly takes him out for long walks. But last Wednesday I needed his help at my Toastmasters meeting, so I took him, and his docking station, along with me. The meeting went great and at the end, I took him out to the car and put him in the front passenger seat. On the way home, I stopped at Publix. It was the 13th and I needed to get some stuff for V-Day.

So get my V-Day stuff, toss it in the car and make my way home. As I am heading down the street to my house, I look over to the passenger seat...Fred is gone! The docking station is there, but no Fred. I pull into the driveway, park, and then look under the seats for Fred. No Fred.

I go inside, put the treats for wifey and the little ones away, and then tell wifey that I lost Fred. She goes out and looks with me. Again, no Fred. Wifey calls the restaurant where my meeting was. No Fred. I drive there to see if maybe he sprawled out on the parking lot. No Fred. At this point I am certain that Fred was taken while I was in Publix and this has me really ticked. How could I be so stupid as to not lock the car doors?!

While I was checking out the parking lot, wifey calls Matt for any ideas. He told her to check the side pockets of the car doors. Upon my return to the house, she conveys the message to me and, knowing this is pointless because Fred is in the grubby paws of some little punk who's laughing at my Lionel Ritchie collection, I check anyway. Wouldn't you know that's where the little bugger was? Thanks Matt!

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

When Does It Get Better?

Friday night was the first night that Mrs. Pheasantly we decided to have our 4 month old sleep in his own room. Up until then, he had been cosleeping with her. We recall that it took two nights for Son # 1 to adjust and sleep through the night. Well, my fellow bloggers, it's been 4 nights (that's twice along if you're playing along at home) and it ain't (yes, I said ain't) happening.

Monday, February 18, 2008

Today's Weigh In - 2/18/2008

Drumstickroll please....

...1 more pound has fallen to the wayside.

I know, I know...a pound doesn't deserve much fan fare, but it IS moving in the right direction.

Friday was a bad day in the world of food choices and it might need a few more days to catch up with me, so let's see how I do next week.

Until then: I'll eat what I love, I'll love what I eat and I'll pass on everything else.

Got Cados?

Yesterday morning, Sunday, it was time to harvest the crops from the back 5.

That would be 5 square feet, not acres, and the crops consist of two strawberry plants, a tomato plant, 2 herb plants, and a fruit tree. Son and I walked over to the strawberry plants which yielded for us ...wait for it... three entire ripe strawberries. We took them inside, washed them, and shared our bounty with Mrs. Pheasantly Fascinating.

Now it was time to check out the fruit tree, which is an Avocado tree. So I asked for help:

Me: Hey buddy, would you like to help look for Avocados?
Son # 1: Sure!
Me: Okay, let's go.
Son # 1: Let me tell mommy.
Me: Um, Okay.
Son # 1: Mommy!!!!
Mrs. Pheasantly Fascinating: Yes, sweety?
Son # 1: We're going to look for All-the-Cados.
Mrs. Pheasantly Fascinating: All the Cados, huh?
Son # 1: Yep, all of them!

Sunday, February 17, 2008

A [easy] Book Meme

I got this meme from the Queen of Meme** Hilda. So, here's the deal:

> Pick up the nearest book of 123 pages or more - No cheating.
> Turn to page 123 and find the first five sentences.
> Now post the next three sentences.
> The fun begins - - tag some people to play along.

** Disclaimer: This title is limited to bloggers currently living in the U.S. - I wouldn't want to cross Dixie!

The book is "The Book of Inside Information" with no author specified. It just says "By the Editors and Experts of Bottom Line Personal". Page 123, sentences 6,7 and 8:

How it works: In addition to its regular group term insurance, the company buys a post-retirement live reserve policy for an executive. The money paid for this policy each year goes to fund a tax-free trust that earns interest.

Okay, so do I win something for what no doubt will be the lamest entry?

As usual, I won't tag anyone - if you want to play please let me know in my Comments.

Who are these people?

The folks that come up with the next greatest baby product or service – who are these people? I can tell you that they certainly are NOT parents. I know this because of two reasons: a) once a parent has figured out how to get their baby to eat strained veggies that taste as bad as they look, well, their creative juices are kaput and b) these products and services stink almost as bad as the subjects they were designed for.

Let’s start off with the baby monitor. Any one who has been in close proximity to a newborn, let’s say within 3 city blocks, can tell you that these bundles of noise need no assistance in being heard. Yet someone took it upon themselves to invent a contraption that can broadcast the wails of a child. Why?! Who are these people? And who buys baby monitors? It’s certainly not the parents! Because once a parent has gotten their kid or kids asleep and has managed to fall a slumber as well, the last thing they need is the amplified sound of their baby crying just mere feet, nay, inches from their ears! Yeah, that’s just a fantastic idea. And God forbid if you get the receiver and the speaker mixed up and put them in the wrong rooms. Many an unsuspecting parent has done such a thing, thus allowing the kids to hear clearly the sounds coming from the parents’ bedroom. There just isn’t enough therapy to fix that blunder.

So now that baby and parent are awake, it’s time to get baby dressed. What to wear? What to wear? Fear not, because thanks to non-parent clothing designers, there is no shortage in cutesy-wootsey outfits and apparel to don upon said child. Who are these people? Whose idea was it to encourage parents to spend their hard earned cash to buy adorable clothes that will be put on some of the leakiest things known to mankind? Thou thinks I doth exaggerate too much? Really? There’s stuff coming from the rear, the front, and the top. A baby has 7 openings, 5 of which are prone to emit fluids and or solids without warning or provocation. And someone wants to dress it up? Wait, I’ll give you a moment, I know some of you are still doing the math thing. Okay, I suggest we design a onesie that is the equivalent of camouflage for babies. It will have all the shades of brown green and yellow. Thus, making it a challenge for anyone to determine what the child either did or did not eat, and whether it found purchase on the garment while it was on its way in or coming out.

And finally, the creators of baby websites: who are these people? Whose bright idea was it to create a place for manic minded parents that are numb from sleep deprivation to share their question or ideas with other like minded poor souls? I, personally, would like to thank m-heart-m 380 from Des Moines for her posting about how newborn poop smells like curried yogurt. She’s right…and thanks to her…I can no longer eat Indian food!

In summation, I deplore implore of you: If you know any designers or inventors of baby products or services, please ask them to cease their mayhem, to find new careers, and to leave it in the hands of those that know what others like them really need! As soon as we have an opportunity to catch a little shu… ZzZzZz

PS My plan is to deliver this during the next Toastmasters Humorous Speech Contest. I'll take any tips or suggestions for making this funnier.

Saturday, February 16, 2008

The No Excuses Not-Friday Saturday Shuffle

It's been a while since my last blog entry. And, no, unfortunately it's not because I've been cruising the Carribean like our friend Tracey Michele. I've even missed a few Friday Shuffles - probably the easiest thing to post that there is. I have no excuses. It is what it is. I am thankful to all of my blogging friends, and you know who you are, for sticking by me and encouraging me to keep posting. So here it, one day late, this week's shuffle!

Take 'er away Fred - God, am I glad I still have Fred; but that's for another post.

1. "Get a Rhythm" performed by the man...Johnny Cash. I also have a CD with this song performed by a little known group called NRBQ. An awesome toe-tapping song.
2. "Margarita" by Traveling Wilburys
3. "Edie's Teddy" by Magenta from The Rocky Horror Picture Show
4. "Hey Good Lookin'" performed by Jimmy Buffet.
5. "Girls of Summer" performed by by an overrated bubble gum rock band...can you tell that I share Fred with my wifey?
6. "White Trash Wedding" by the Dixie Chicks - okay, I don't like kuntry, but I do like Bluegrass, go figure!
7. "Being for the Benefit of Mr. Kite", proof that the Beatles created more songs than they should have!
8. "Your Song", by Elton John. A beautiful song.
9. "You Oughta Know" by Alanis Morissette - seriously, this chick needs Anger Management courses.
10. "Midnight Train to Georgia" performed by the Indigo Girls. Nicely done, ladies.

I hope that everyone is having a great weekend.

Monday, February 4, 2008

He had really big feet!

Son # 1: He had really big feet!
(at 7:05 am, pre-coffee for mommy & me)

Me: What? Who, baby? Who had really big feet?

Son # 1: I was hungry so I looked under my door. He was putting my cereal for me at my table. He had really big feet.

Son # 1 looks down at the floor where I'm standing and and then his little face takes an expression so proud as if had he discovered the theory of relativity.

Son # 1: It was you, daddy! You got my cereal for me.

PS: My feet aren't really all that big, by the way.